May 2011
24 posts
Great moments in Werner Herzog voiceovers. →
YESSSSSSS.
April 2011
25 posts
A promise.
My feelings about the collapse of civilization may prove to be untrue; as long as humanity has existed, it has been excited about predicting its own end.
But if we all have to return to the Middle Ages, please promise me that at least once, you sat in the tub, let a hot shower or bath run over your legs and feet, and ate straight from a pint of ice cream.
Do not neglect this action. You may...
Watchbeatyourwings:
jon hamm. a blue puppet. a journey. music. america.
happy friday, everyone.
Sometimes, the simplest things can be the most revelatory.
(Tell me something I don’t know.)
What you're missing by not dating me
I went on a promising OKCupid date on Monday. The guy was cute, polite, and interesting. He’s into homebrewing and Achewood. He saw “Collapse” and is now afraid of peak oil. He drinks Racer 5 and has opinions on the novels of David Mitchell. We went to a bar and talked for four hours straight, until I had to go home and hit the sack to get up early for my commuter Tuesday. I was...
“You’re way more likely to hear about the times a woman did something that...”
– Further evidence as to why The Hairpin is one of the best blogs ever.
"Catfish" is happening again! →
I won’t say any more, so that I don’t spoil the film for those who haven’t seen it. But this is just…wow. Lots in common between the person in the film and this person, too.
On pitching
I can’t pitch for shit.
In case you don’t work in journalism, “pitching” is the act of proposing a story to an editor or other higher-up. It involves finding something new and unique to write about, condensing the salient facts and why they matter into a few sentences, and then winding up and hoping that your boss will be waiting at the other end with the catcher’s...
“Hellooooo
you are very cute! message me back so we can talk?? :) :)
and...”
– Rich told me that when his friend and her boyfriend* have a fight, she turns on her OKCupid profile for a few days to get an ego boost from the messages. Apparently, she’s not a magnet for idiots.
* Not Rich’s girlfriend. Sorry, Rich. This is why I’m a food journalist.
San Francisco vs. New York
I just got back from a week in New York, which is exactly the right amount of time to start thinking about the advantages and disadvantages of the two cities. This is a long, hard-fought, and probably boring debate, but I was surprised how many things caught my attention as being markedly different.
New York wins:
Public transportation. Every single train I took, for a whole week, was on time...
The old crone next to me glared when I laughed at...
Woman on plane: Honey, scoot over to the window.
Her 3-year-old daughter: Why?
Woman: Because little girls have to sit by the window.
Kid: Why do they have to do that?
Woman: (obviously lying and relishing it) I don't know, that's just the rule!
Kid: OK! (moves over)
How to kill your fruit flies
It seems like whenever the weather gets warm, the fruit flies (those little brown specks of bugs) come out in droves. The last time I had a bad infestation, I picked up this trick on the Internet. It works like a charm, so I thought I’d share.
First, get a drinking glass (as you can see below, my fruit flies enjoy Guinness). Fill it with maybe three tablespoons of vinegar. I usually use red...
“While the 87 freshmen Republicans in the House ran on a platform of containing...”
– Budget, or controlling my womb? Budget, womb, budget…nope, womb.
"I spent half an hour trying to learn to walk as... →
My history of (not) playing video games, at The Tangential.
“My first day of work at Microsoft, 15 years ago, I wore a DOJ baseball cap that...”
– Is this the real root of why Congress seems totally disconnected from the impact of its decisions on real humans (the case on both ends, albeit amplified on the right)? Do they think of themselves as just playing a really big, really involved game of “Mafia Wars?” (source)
“you have such a great profile and love to talk.and one more think i love your...”
– Wait, how do you know I love to talk? Youngactor24, have you been stalking me?
Werner Herzog has never heard of "The Simpsons." →
When he was asked to do a voice for it, he was confused, because he thought it was a newspaper strip.
“If ‘Pineapple Express’ had been about two girls, they wouldn’t have...”
– Seth Rogen, being honest. The fact that he’s right makes me sob.
